Thank y’all for reading this year, I have started drafting some field notes for early 2019, which I’m really stoked on, and I wanted to end the year with a bit of lighthearted content for y’all.
Earlier this year, I asked two graphic designers if they would answer a few questions about dating a creative professional. I’ve spent the majority of my career romantically unattached, however I believe that dating artists and creatives is a markedly different experience than dating other personality types - decorating the house is full of implications, deciding on a dinner spot is about so much more than food, etc. Chico Goler is the creative force behind the Santa Fe based brand Goler and Kelsey Ullrich is his lovely partner, an independent graphic designer and the founder of Inner Circle, a holistic retreat space. Below are their responses.
Do aesthetics play a big role in your attraction to each other?
KELSEY: I think so! When I first met Chico I was really attracted to his personal style. Then, when I saw his home for the first time, I was drawn in even more. I loved the aesthetic of his space - the art, colors, and furniture. He has a very modern and contemporary style (which I also personally love). That was something I hadn't seen in many men I had dated before. So, that was a huge plus and really stood out for me. Even the places he chose for dates spoke into an aesthetic, if you will. Even now, as we've been together for a few years, it's still something that really connects us. We just moved into a new home and it's been super fun to come together and design our space. It's a really bonding experience when you and your partner share a similar style and you can express that together.
CHICO: I think so, I think designers in general already gravitate towards other artists. We look at style, how they dress, how they carry themselves.... what makes them unique. If you have that in common, you know you'll have other things in common.
What’s your partner’s favorite typeface? What is the one design decision that Kelsey/Chico makes that you can’t get behind?
KELSEY: If I had to guess...it's probably something like Bauhaus.
CHICO: Hmm, she likes simple, modern typefaces for work, you can tell she likes a gentle and elegant quality, nothing aggressive or harsh. In terms of a certain design that i can't get behind, there isn't really. I think she's a better designer than me, so i like everything she creates.
How do you want to be treated by relationship partners + what makes dating a designer different that dating another creative professional?
KELSEY: When in relationship, the essentials like trust, respect, and autonomy are huge. I really like the word "partner" because I believe that's what a romantic relationship should be. A partnership. Both individuals are treated as equals and think in terms of what's best for the other person, thus benefiting the relationship. They support the person, their dreams, and values. Allowing the other person to authentically be who they are and not who they think the person "should" be. I think this is challenging for a lot of folks but ultimately what true love is.
I think dating a designer is unique in that we both value aesthetic so much--it influences our home, the products we purchase (and don't purchase), and the places we go. If it doesn't "feel" a certain way then it doesn't appeal to us. Even when we're out and about, commenting on the concept of a space or the way a restaurant menu is designed is a common topic of conversation for us. I really like sharing that with someone because many non-designers don't understand or have that natural sense. It's really enjoyable to relate in that way with the person you're with romantically.
CHICO: Not sure how to answer the question, I like that we can trust one another to get an honest opinion about a certain project or the direction that maybe we should be going in. It's rare that we disagree, I think we respect one another's work, style or aesthetic. Is it different than other creative professionals? I don't think there's much of a difference. We love and respect the arts, we have those sensibilities.